Going Home for the Holidays: Remember Progress over Perfection

Going home for the holidays after a period of healing can feel akin to trying to fit into an outfit that is four sizes too small—uncomfortable, constricting, and perhaps even overwhelming. The atmosphere of family gatherings, with their unique blend of joy and tension, can trigger a whirlwind of emotions that challenge the progress you have made. As you navigate through this familiar territory, it can be particularly difficult to remember to apply all the techniques and strategies that have aided you in your healing journey. The sights, sounds, and interactions may evoke memories and feelings that you thought you had moved past. Therefore, I encourage each of you, over the next two weeks, to extend grace to yourselves and to acknowledge just how far you have come on this path of recovery.

Key Reminders: Remember Progress

• It doesn't matter that Crazy Uncle Earl goaded you into a reaction once; what truly matters is your overall progress.

• Remember, you successfully stopped yourself the other 38 times, demonstrating your growth and self-control.

It’s important to acknowledge that loving from afar is not only acceptable but often necessary for your well-being. Sometimes, the environment that once felt familiar can become overwhelming, and stepping back is a form of self-care. You may find that the size of the emotional space you once occupied with loved ones has shifted; it no longer fits. You can cherish the memories and the love you have for them while recognizing that returning to that environment might not be conducive to your healing. By loving them from a distance, you honor your journey and protect your peace, allowing yourself to grow without the weight of past dynamics pulling you back.

Peace in chaos comes from within.

Conclusion

As you gather with family, take a moment to embrace yourself and remember progress over perfection. Healing is not a linear journey; it is filled with ebbs and flows, peaks and valleys. Each step forward, no matter how small it may seem, is a testament to your strength and resilience. Allow yourself to enjoy the holidays, filled with laughter and connection, while also holding onto the knowledge of how far you’ve come. Recognize that it’s perfectly acceptable to feel a mix of emotions during this time—joy, nostalgia, and even anxiety. Embrace them all as part of your unique journey and remember that you have the tools and the strength to navigate through any challenges that may arise. Celebrate the progress you’ve made and look forward to the continued growth that lies ahead!