The Airplane Theory: How I Learned to Put My Mask on First in Parenting - No Cost Ways to Thrive in the First 5 Years
- Neoma Conner
- Apr 11
- 4 min read
As a new parent, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed. Sleepless nights, endless diaper changes, and the struggle to establish a routine can leave anyone feeling frazzled. I stumbled upon the “Airplane Theory,” which teaches us that in an emergency, we need to secure our own oxygen mask before assisting others. This simple concept resonated deeply with me during the challenging early years of parenting. Finding ways to apply this theory to my life has been transformative, helping me become a better parent to my child.
In this post, I’ll share how to embrace the Airplane Theory through practical strategies that cost little to no money. When we prioritize self-care, we become the best versions of ourselves for our children.
Understanding the Airplane Theory
The Airplane Theory emphasizes the importance of self-care. Many parents feel guilty about taking time for themselves, yet neglecting our own needs leads to burnout. When I first heard this analogy, I understood that without prioritizing my well-being, I would have little energy left to nurture my child effectively.
When we are focused on self-care, we can engage more fully with our children. For instance, studies show that parents who practice self-care report a 40% increase in their overall happiness and a 25% boost in patience with their children. Without self-care, stress can make us irritable and distant, negatively impacting our children's emotional health.
Embracing Self-Care During the Early Years
Self-care doesn’t have to come with a hefty price tag. Here are effective, low-cost strategies I adopted to ensure I was in the best state to care for my child:
Set up Quiet Time– For Family
Establishing quiet time became essential not just for my child but for my own well-being. I started by making it a game for the children. I explained that the child who could remain silent and watch their TV or read their book got "dessert" for breakfast (French Toast! Calm down.). This quiet time allowed me to sip my soda, cook breakfast in peace, and gather my thoughts on the To-Dos of the day. Lastly, if they did need something, dad was home, and it was his time to shine. This simple change created a calm start to my day and significantly lifted my mood, enabling me to approach parenting more positively.
Connect with Other Parents
Building a support network was crucial, especially since I homeschooled. I connected with fellow parents online. Joining parenting groups and participating in forums gave me a space to share my struggles and victories. This emotional support was validating, especially hearing their stories, and knowing that statistically nearly 90% of parents experience similar challenges. It made me feel less isolated and more understood as I navigated this journey.
Hobbies became a priority
Engaging in hobbies is a vital aspect of self-care, as they provide an opportunity for relaxation, creativity, and personal fulfillment. Prioritizing hobbies allows individuals to step away from daily stresses and reconnect with their passions, ultimately enhancing mental well-being. By dedicating time to activities that bring joy and satisfaction, one can cultivate a balanced lifestyle that promotes happiness and reduces anxiety. Here are ten hobbies that are either free or can be enjoyed for under ten dollars:
Reading books from the library
Gardening with seeds or cuttings
Drawing or sketching with basic materials
Writing in a journal or starting a blog
Hiking or walking in nature
Cooking or baking with inexpensive ingredients
Crafting with recycled materials or reclaimed garbage from local park
Photography using a smartphone or already owned camera
Practicing yoga or meditation at home
Cleaning up nature from litterbugs
Prioritize Physical Movement
Regular physical activity has a profound impact on our mental well-being. I made it a goal to incorporate physical movement into my week. Whether it's a brisk walk, a yoga session, or dancing around my living room with my baby, these activities strengthened my body and boosted my mood. Research indicates that even 30 minutes of daily exercise can reduce feelings of depression by about 47%.
Setting Boundaries
Setting boundaries with children can be challenging. I learned that it’s okay to decline invitations or family obligations when I'm feeling stretched. Being assertive about my needs allowed me to create a more supportive environment for both myself and my child.
By saying ‘no’ when necessary, I found more personal time to recharge. Establishing these boundaries not only earned me respect from friends and family but also provided me with the much-needed downtime to focus on self-care.
Finding Joy in Simple Moments
One of the greatest lessons I've learned is to celebrate the small joys of everyday life. Whether it’s reading a bedtime story, watching my child play, or breaking up a sibling fight that has stretched on too long, these tiny moments remind me of the beauty in parenting.
Practice Gratitude
Keeping a gratitude journal became a simple yet impactful part of my daily routine. Each evening, I noted down three things I was grateful for, regardless of how small. This practice shifted my focus from the chaos of parenting towards the daily beauties and milestones.
Research shows that maintaining a gratitude practice can enhance overall well-being and increase happiness levels by over 20%. This approach not only improved my outlook but also deepened my appreciation for the parenting journey, allowing me to find joy even in challenging moments.
Reflecting on Self-Care
The Airplane Theory serves as a vital reminder that we must prioritize our well-being in order to be the best parents we can be. Through my experiences, I’ve understood that self-care is not just a luxury; it is a necessity. By adopting no-cost strategies like establishing personal routines, connecting with fellow parents, engaging in mindfulness, and celebrating the little moments, I’ve transformed my parenting journey into a fulfilling experience.
As you navigate the first five years of your child's life, remember the importance of "putting your mask on first." By taking care of ourselves, we create a loving and nurturing environment for our children to thrive. Here’s to thriving in parenthood and activating our “Airplane Mode!”
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